MARYLAND JUDGE SMACKS DOWN BOOK BANNING CLOWNS
A Maryland judge has finally told school boards they cannot just erase books they find inconvenient.
🚨 🚨 🚨 STOP THE PRESSES 🚨 🚨 🚨 YOU ABSOLUTE MELTDOWN 🧊 🧊 🧊 MONKEYS 🐒 🐒 🐒 IN THE HARFORD COUNTY SCHOOL BOARD 🏫 📚 🚫 HAVE FINALLY BEEN PUT IN THEIR PLACE 👊 💥 📉 BY A JUDGE WHO APPARENTLY PREFERS READING 📖 🤓 TO STAGING A TOTALITARIAN BOOK PYRE 🔥 🪵 🪵 🪵 IT'S FLAMER 🖍️ 🏳️🌈 YOU CLOWNS 🤡 🤡 🤡 AND IT'S BACK ON THE SHELVES 📦 📤 📚 BECAUSE WE ARE NOT LIVING IN A DYSTOPIAN FEVER DREAM 😴 💊 🧟 💥 SO TAKE YOUR CONTROVERSIAL ISSUES POLICIES 📝 💩 🚮 AND SHOVE THEM WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE ☀️ 🌑 🍑 WE ARE LITERALLY WATCHING THE FREEDOM TO READ 🗽 🦅 📕 GET GUTTED BY SMALL-TOWN SMALL-MINDS 🤏 🧠 🤏 AND IT’S DISGUSTING 🤮 🤮 🤮 WAKE UP ⏰ 📢 👁️ BEFORE YOUR LOCAL LIBRARY 🏛️ 🤫 🕸️ BECOMES A GHOST TOWN 👻 🏚️ OF BLANK PAGES 📄 📄 📄 AND STATE-SANCTIONED IGNORANCE 🫵 🧠 🚫 KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF OUR STORIES ✍️ 📕 ✋ OR WE’RE COMING FOR YOUR SCHOOL BOARD SEATS 🪑 🪑 🪑 AT THE NEXT ELECTION 🗳️ 🗳️ 🗳️ 💅
What's actually happening
A Maryland Circuit Court judge has ordered the Harford County school board to reinstate the graphic novel 'Flamer' to library shelves after it was previously removed. The ruling follows ongoing legal and public debate regarding book access in public schools and the authority of school boards to restrict literature based on content-based objections. This decision adds to a growing list of judicial interventions across the country regarding the constitutionality of book removals in educational institutions.
Read the real reporting
Everything in the rant above is satire and should be treated as such. The summary and links are here so you can read the original reporting — and decide for yourself.
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